Second Round
by DarkestWolfx
Summary: All he wanted was a shower. Why did shopping have to be so complicated? And why did he always end up going? Next time, Scott could be lumped with the responsibility, smaller craft or not. Spoilers for 'Grandma Tourismo' (28/10/17).


Just a little episode tag as usual. I hope you enjoy.

Note; so after this episode raised the question of age, I am still going to go with what we have known from the information ITV gave us when the series started, so John is still older than Virgil in my mind.

* * *

Next time they needed anything, especially a list of this magnitude, he was not going.

John had given him an opportunity to back out, but he'd thought it would be ok. He thought he could handle a simple shopping list. He hadn't however, planned for the list to be body length nor for a very strenuous and nerve-snapping rescue to land slap bang in the middle of it. And of course, it had to be a full restock run as opposed to a small trip. And Grandma had to get distracted by something else. Not to mention that as they were here and since they already had several pieces of the stores property - unpaid for - in the pod, it made sense (in Grandma's mind) and for some reason they just had to go back, now.

It couldn't wait an hour or two.

Well, he supposed the manager would definitely be angsty by the time they returned. Surely, with how much Grandma had spent there for the family over the years and the fact they were International Rescue, meant they were trustworthy. It shouldn't matter that they left as long as they returned, but the world revolved round money.

So he piloted Thunderbird Two back to the car park, and no he was not repaying the parking charge he'd already put into the meter, especially considering he had to pay for each space: with Two's immovable wing span, he took up four, just shy of five. Or, what he called shy. He probably should have paid for five...

Oh well, they were going to buy enough to waver that small cost, he was certain. In fact, from what was in the cargo pod, he had a feeling they already had.

"Come on, Virgil!"

"Yes, Grandma." He was so glad the matriarch of the family was in the cargo bay, so she didn't see him drop his head onto the console with a considerable bang.

"Uh... Virgil?"

His ears must have been ringing. That's the only thing he could think of to explain how he'd missed the call signal. "John..."

His brother sounded perfectly sceptical to his ears. "Are you sleeping?"

"No." He mumbled. Maybe the steering column could substitute as a pillow now John had made him think about it… "Wouldn't dream of it."

"Good, because keeping Grandma from a shopping trip isn't wise." So John had seen that they touched down then. Maybe he'd called to wish him luck.

That's nice of him.

But he was right; he couldn't risk keeping Grandma waiting, especially with the mammoth list. To him all it represented was the extra time it would put in the way of him getting home. The only place he really wanted to be right now.

So, I better move.

Maybe John called because he knew he'd be dead on his feet by now. Maybe it was meant to be an inspiring and rousing speech which he'd completely missed due to dosing in and out. John's last words seemed so far away now as well, so that looked like an entirely possible option. He'd love it to be an option, to stay here, nice and safely tucked away in the belly of his baby…

He sighed, yet he knew he had to move.

"I know, I know. I'm going." From the slightly shocked look he caught appear on John's face, he assumed the elder hadn't actually said anymore since.

Pulling himself to his feet actually took a lot more effort than he'd expected, that and he suddenly became very aware of _badly_ he smelt. He'd put a lot of effort into trying _not_ to be _crushed_. Rightly so. Still, he was sure at one point the sweat had started dripping into his eyes. The pressure from the sand was making the roof heavy and the insulation provided from the rocks fallen outside was making it like tin can.

And whatever Gordon said about Thunderbird Two being 'cantankerous' and a 'green version of a tin can' on hot days, the aquanaut really did know nothing of what made up a real tin can. That roof wad harder to silence than his Thunderbird any day.

He made sure to lock the module as he left, climbing into the cargo pod's drivers seat. The last thing he needed was someone stealing anything.

And then the shopping trip began in full all over again.

 _Hoo- blinking -ray._

* * *

"Oh, Virgil, don't forget the hairspray!"

No, no, couldn't forget anything for Scottie.

Well, next time, Scott could come if he wanted hair products (subtly forgetting of course that he sometimes 'borrowed' it from his brother – that was the privilege he got for actually _going_ out and _buying_ it). In fact, scrap that, Scott could come and do the shopping altogether. It must have been at least two years since the eldest of their bunch even set foot in a store.

As he drove around to join the woman in the next aisle over – hairspray now in tow too along with super-shine, just so that his brother could have perfect and shiny hair for the next rescue of course – he wasn't surprised at what he saw, but he was completely and utterly murdered.

And no, that description was not extreme – the roof had been attempting to squish him like a bug earlier, after all.

Grandma wasn't even looking for things on the list now! Ok, in fairness, she definitely deserved to do a little browsing for herself after everything she did today. He would never forget that she saved his life, nor that he owed her completely for that, and that added up to part of the reason he said nothing about the additional clothes shopping now.

Instead he just laid himself over the console and waited, dozing just enough, thinking to keep himself on the borders of consciousness. He really would get an earful if he fell asleep in the store.

It just wasn't fair.

All he wanted was a shower.

A simple shower and he'd have happily come back and finished the shopping, yes he may have dragged the whole family, but he'd have happily finished the idiotic task. Why did they bother? Gordon could swim: why didn't they just start fishing for their next meal? They did live on an island after all, so why not going to the full extremes? Certainly, considering they pushed the extremes in every other area. But no, when it came to shopping and house work (providing there was enough down time), they were like any other family. Except maybe that they had a Thunderbird for a car and a Cargo Pod for a shopping trolley.

Well, there you go, a prime example of pushing things to the extremes! They can't even do shopping normally.

And on that note, why did shopping always have to be so complicated?

They couldn't just come wanting a few bits and bobs, no they went from looking at hair products to electrical cabling, vitamins to piano strings, snooker cues to anti-rust spray. Yes, all of that was perfectly simple, not to mention finding the fire extinguishers which happened to be on the complete opposite side of the damn store to the stupid celery crunch bars and aisles away from the tanning lotion. Besides, it was only really the youngest two being around that made the blinking things necessary.

Don't get him wrong, he had nothing against shopping or against spending time for Grandma in a relatively normal way, if you took the meaning of the word as vague. No, his problem with shopping, especially full on restocking runs, was simple.

Why did he always end up going?

Surely, everyone else we capable of taking a trip? Well, save John, John could be excused. Coming down in the space elevator would be a step too far, and incredibly ridiculous. Maybe EOS could start ordering their shopping? That was worth suggesting.

Ok, he understood why they sent him. He had the biggest Thunderbird with the larger cargo bay - completely ignoring Thunderbird Three's capacity, because that was another silly idea: bringing a rocket to a store! - and he was her pilot, but that didn't mean someone else couldn't do the shopping.

Scott always managed to get out of it, because his Thunderbird would be far too overloaded by the end of this trip. Of course there was no way he would allow the elder to pilot his craft either, as a co-pilot yes, sole pilot no. Still, everyone should take a turn, despite the fact he was stronger and had Thunderbird Two at his disposal.

So yes, Scott could be lumped with the responsibility, smaller craft or not.

Actually, he'd happily fly his elder brother there if that's what it took. Just so long as he didn't have to set foot or pod inside this store again for a while, he would be happy.

"Right, Virgil, let's go."

Go? They'd done everything already? He was sure they'd had more on the list, but maybe a miracle happened with time. Going certainly wasn't a problem for him. So as Grandma climbed in, he started the pod up and turned the full circle to head for home.

"Um, Virgil, the other way."

His stop was absolutely horrendous this time and the squad of the tyres went straight to his head.

"What?"

"We need to go the other way, for tofu."

Of course they did. Why did he ever dare think they were done? He was hoping they'd manage to be 'done' at some point today, but taking a glance towards the door and the fading light, he'd wondered if they'd manage to wish before the end of the week rolled around, let alone the next sunrise.

* * *

The beeping of the communications unit was just another thing to drive him mental. He probably flicked the switch with less care than he would normally too.

 _Sorry, Two._

"Virgil, are you taking off soon?"

Of course it was John. Well, he was actually glad it was John. That meant this conversation was going to be easier, likely to focus on _him_ as opposed to what he'd feared. He'd feared it would be Gordon on the other end, desperate to know what was taking them so long, because _his_ favourite snack had been finished for days now and Grandma had told him he could not have more until their schedule shopping trip.

He laughed. The aquanaut couldn't even tag along to get something for himself, so he didn't know why he thought he'd ever get Gordon to do the shopping. The thought of living on Celery Crunch Bars and Cheese Puffs was enough to turn his stomach upside, around at all angles. He suddenly felt perfectly sick too.

 _Even better._

What a great day this was turning out to be. Why had he ever come out with high hopes for it?

"Grandma's just double checking we got everything."

Organised and level-headed John. He was never going to understand their Grandma's method of shopping and it was likely a good thing they didn't go on shopping expeditions together, although saying that, John's would definitely be a fair sight easier. "Didn't you do that in the store?"

"Yes, but it was a _big_ list, so she's going through it in _order_ and _crossing_ each item out _individually_."

"Ah."

Yeah John, _tell me about it_ , tedious. A shower was still calling his name and it was still so, so far away. He just wanted to be red of the quarry smell. Not to mention the dust he'd gathered from the sandstorm, a lot of which the store's venting had probably whipped up.

Wait, was John frowning at him?

"Are you going to be awake enough to fly?"

"Yeah, I'm not _that_ type of tired. Besides, I've got a co-pilot." Grandma didn't do half bad at piloting two considering she'd never done it before, never flown anything bigger than a plane and not even that in a long, long… hmm, John was probably right on the long time. Although he did notice the slight scratches when he looked at the module properly, however he chose not to mention them for the sake of it. Grandma could have her moment of victory.

He could paint over it later as much as he didn't want to have to.

Clearly the day had stressed John too though, "Virgil, don't even joke."

Sorry, he honestly forgot John wasn't fond of humour, least of all in the wake of an intense rescue.

"We'll be fine, John. As soon as we get in the air that is." He rested his arms over the steering column, risking a glance around towards the cargo bay.

"Celery crunch bars... Check!"

Of course they were there; he remembered personally picking them up! The worst part was, they weren't even that far down the list.

"Oh..." He groaned his head falling once again as though his spine had died before connecting with his neck. At least this time it landed on his arms which were definitely softer. It wouldn't serve to have another bump to the head.

"Virgil-" He'd forgotten John was still there. His red-headed brother was likely thinking something serious had gone wrong now. And that was definitely the last thing he needed added to the day.

"Just keep listening in and let me know when she gets to the anti-rust spray." He remembered that clearly as being the second to last item.

"Will do." With that the call beeped to a close.

Peace and quiet. Oh, it was wonderful. He wasn't sure he had any strength left in his hands. Yes, he'd had his equipment to help him, but that level of pressure still had the shocks running with splintering force down his bones. It was miraculous actually that he hadn't broken anything.

He spared a moment to look outside. It really was getting dark now. The shopping had proven to take them quite a while and now they were going to be here for another hour, surely, whilst Grandma checked the list. He could imagine how long it was going to take them to get home and the worst part was, the time zone would of course be different.

Spectacular.

This time he didn't stop himself dozing as his head rested comfortably on his arms.

* * *

The only show of light now was coming from Two's console. They were little dots in his blinking vision. Something must have woken him. He just hoped it wasn't Grandma. That would involve and awkward explanation, and she'd probably offer to pilot again. _He_ was _very_ happy to pilot them home.

"Virgil?" Someone was definitely calling him… who though? He wasn't awake enough to be thinking. He heard a sigh. "Anti-rust spray."

Hold on.. that's what he told a certain spaceman to tell him.

His head shot up immediately. "John! She's done?"

"Pretty much." The elder shrugged.

"Yes!" He realised then he might have needed to reign the volume in. John didn't seem phased by it though. Actually, he was definitely smiling.

"Well, it's good to see your energy's back."

"It's the hope of a shower, John. I'm one step closer." He started the engine sequence now as well, just so they could get off the ground a little bit quicker when Grandma came back.

"So I'm figuring you want me to at least give you long enough for that before I call you with another rescue."

"John, please try and give me the night." And he was talking their time, not Africa's.

"I'll do my best. It's looking-"

He held a hand up quickly, his snap reactions returning to him in an instant, jolting him back to full awareness. "Don't say it. Do not say it."

Carefully John seemed to catch onto his point and instead filled in the blank with a simple, "Ok."

He let himself breathe and informed Tracy Island he was making his way back just as Grandma came back into the cabin and sat down.

 _Shower, here I come._

* * *

He was glad to be back on the Island after the long haul of a day he'd had, but that was fading very quickly. He landed Two and returned to the lounge, Grandma had insisted she was ok to unpack the shopping into the lift and he didn't make his usual complaints. He _really_ wanted that shower.

And it was about to be jinxed for him. They'd only said hello as well! Let him get that shower in and anyone, anywhere in the world can call for a rescue, even ask for him specifically. He really wouldn't care, but of course, one of them was bound to end up saying it.

"You were unlucky to catch that rescue. John said it's looking quiet out there now."

"No, Scott, no, don't do that!" He saw the way the eldest's eyebrows raised as he placed his hands firmly over his ears and kept walking. "I just want a shower without any interruptions, please!"

He all but run off, considering it seemed the only way in this family, on this Island and with their job to get anything done before a call came through. And he was glad when he got to finish said shower. It put him in a far more relaxed mood, until he came out and remembered the agonies of shopping and felt the phantom pains of holding the weight of the world.

 _Wonderful_.

* * *

He knew he shouldn't have let himself nap in Two's cabin earlier. It meant he was struggling to sleep properly now. As he made his way back into the living room, Alan gave him a merry greeting, which he answered with half the energy the youngest had given him.

From that alone, Alan – in a twist of his usual and sometimes blinkered, bouncy character - seemed to have the sense to leave him a wide berth, and that was appreciated. All he wanted to do now was lounge on the sofa, bathing in the peace and quiet of the beautiful scenery on their South Pacific Island.

And enjoyable, and relaxing, it was until Gordon ran in from wherever he'd been - he couldn't bring himself to be curious, despite knowing he probably should - and spoiled the mood in a second.

"Hey, Virge, where did you and Grandma put my celery crunch bars?"

He wanted to immediately say, _buy them yourself!_

Oh yes, the whole two packs of one hundred individual bars, which were apparently a necessary component to Gordon's daily living. Now, where did they go..?

Space, would have been another brilliant answer, but then Gordon would just call John and badger him. It wasn't fair to put that onto his clueless brother after the day they'd had either. The red-head had probably helped get him through a fair bit of too, and doing that would feel like throwing it back his face.

He shrugged, hoping his direct younger might take the hint and go find Grandma to ask her. He just wasn't in the mood. He wanted to sleep, but he had far too much left-over energy - yes, he knew, it seemed perfectly impossible - running through his vines and so dozing (hopefully uninterrupted) was the best he'd get. Alan had been very respectful, most unusually, and even John had called them silently. He only knew John had called from the whispered conversation he'd heard between him, Alan and Grandma about half an hour ago.

All he'd really taken from that was that Grandma had gone to bake them cookies for a evening treat. John had left Alan with a simple apology, though he didn't sound too heartbroken at the missed opportunity. He wished he hadn't let Grandma mix up a super-sized bag of 'savers' flour now. Although at the time, stuck in the cave of a shop and simply desperately to get home, he'd stopped taking much notice as to why they were collecting. Instead, he'd simply put his efforts towards collecting them.

"Aw, come on, Virge. _I_ don't want to go in the _kitchen_. Grandma's _baking_!"

"Shh!" He didn't feel as though his brain could manage words, not without waking up again and that was out of the question. Besides, his head was aching, probably from all the pressure and the amount of times he'd whacked it (yes voluntarily to a degree) on his console. "And stop calling me Virge."

He didn't mind on occasion as he knew that was just Gordon, but this was twice in under a minute. And he just wasn't in the mood for any of this.

He'd considered playing the piano to relax, especially as he hadn't been able to play it for a few days, yet that was the reason he still wasn't going to play it now. It was the reason he bought new strings today. As much as he loved the instrument and hated to leave it with any out of tune or broken keys, and as much as he desperately longed to play it, he just couldn't bear the thought of getting beneath the lid today.

"Alan-"

"No clue, Gordo." It seemed the youngest blonde was going to work on his side tonight. Well that was a nice change, but then maybe he was still holding the 'Lizard Incident' against Gordon. Oh well, at least they were a lot safer and far securer in Scott's care.

"But you've got what you wanted!" Yes, Alan did have his new pillow cases – hopefully it would convince him to stop using the floor – and from what he last knew, the youngest was in the process of stuffing them with the pillows he'd run to his room to fetch. He'd told Alan where they were because he'd been sat quietly for ten whole minutes and since then another fifteen had passed. And that took them to now.

There had to be a pout on that face as he answered Gordon back, " _Virgil_ gave it to me."

Nice one, Alan. Very well played. Because technically he didn't do any 'giving': honestly, he hadnt moved an inch! He didn't need to open his eyes to know that Gordon was now standing very expectantly, and a lot like a whining puppy, before him.

"Virg-"

"End that with an e, Gordon." He left it open, slightly daring, because he had gone past all this hassle. That was the word to define this day with actually – _hassle_. Look in the dictionary now and find a picture of a rockslide at a quarry in Africa with a little painted version of him attempting to run up the hill.

"Just tell me you got them." And that gave him the idea for a little payback - always risky with Gordon, but the blonde was overdue some - and maybe as a little encouragement for them to do the shopping themselves next time.

So he shook his head and Alan's spluttered laughter painted the rest of the picture for him.

"What do you mean?" He imagined Gordon had likely repeated the shake of the head to fill the end of that question. Still, he didn't intend to re-start his brain any more now than he had a few minutes ago.

"I mean," and once again he shook his head.

"What does who mean?" Scott asked, sounding – from the echoes of his footsteps – as though he was on an escape course.

"Virgil won't tell me where my Celery Crunch Bars are."

And that was clearly a point to continue with… thank you Gordon and thank you Scott for entering now. They were going to give him all the ammunition he needed. In fact, it was as though he'd managed to plant the words in Gordon's head.

"Oh, please tell me you didn't _forget_ them!"

And that was the perfect cue.

"What can I say, Gords, _I've_ had a busy day."

"Well so have I."

"What, sleeping and tanning?" Way to go Alan. Their youngest brother was often the only one who could put a sock in Gordon's mouth and he was very appreciative of this unspoken pairing right now.

"Virgil."

"Scott."

"Could you tell me where my shopping is?"

And why shouldn't he continue to milk the indifference?

"What shopping?" And this time Alan's hand flew to his mouth in an attempt to obscure his chuckles. He knew very well Alan would have seen both items in the bags from when the blonde collected his pillow cases, but the fact he was keeping silent encouraged him that they were tag teaming this. It was safe to continue by all means.

"You know."

"What, hair products?"

"Yes."

"They were for you?"

"Yes. _You_ know that." Oh, Scott… far, far too gullible for once.

"Let me think. I don't think we got those either."

"What?"

"Yeah, what? You were there most of the evening."

"We kind of ended up in a rush. We did the shopping in two goes and I guess we forgot to cross of what we had and hadn't picked up from before the rescue."

Alan was definitely enjoying this. Scott and Gordon on the other hand looked to be floundering in shock.

"Well what are we supposed to do?"

"I've had four days without any Celery Crunch Bars, Virgil, I can't go another!"

He shrugged again, returning his hands to rest behind his head. This was going to be the killer. The complete and utter payback for _always_ lumping the job on him.

"You'll just have to go shopping."

Alan burst into a fit of laughter he actually did have to get up and physically stop to save the boy from choking, but that was worth it to see the expressions on his brother's faces. To see the glance they shared at thinking they'd actually been _forgotten_. Yeah right, as if Grandma would-

"Boys! Cookies!" That just made Alan's dying laughter actually turn into chocking and quickly Scott and Gordon were on the move.

"I think I'll just take Thunderbird One out for a run."

"I think I'll join you, big brother." Gordon answered heading off promptly after his brother.

Oh yes, that was an escape from Grandma's cookies.

* * *

So when he asked John later, purely out of interest for their brother's wellbeing of course, as to where Thunderbird One had ended up, the fact the straight man of the family laughed momentarily said it all.

And when John relayed the answer to him, simply as "shopping", it was Alan's turn to stop his laughter from turning into choking.

Grandma was upset they'd had to miss the cookies as well, so Scott and Gordon could have the second round of those when they returned with the second round of shopping


End file.
